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Old 05-21-2008, 08:22 PM   #1
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Originally Posted by Ellis View Post
10/02/07
Stories:
And that reminds me of another side story. I had a math teacher who came into the students bathroom while I was relieving myself. The guy just walked right up to the urinal next to me and started talking to me. Is that not weird? You just don't do that... it is an unwritten rule.
Quote:
Originally Posted by buckeyefan78 View Post
3/06/08
Me: I thought we were going to the store.
Her: I have to get some things so I'd prefer to go alone
Me: What does that have to do with anything?
Her: You slow me up. Plus you b-itch and moan the whole time about prices of things you don't even buy.
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Originally Posted by catman View Post
10/28/03
Marc, if I may add a suggestion, with the political season coming up on us quickly, you might consider adding a "temporary" board for political discussions. They can get pretty heated (I speak from experience) and they are not for the faint of heart. The board should be prefaced with a warning and that should keep those who don't wish to participate from entering by accident.
You might wish to have 2 moderators for the board, one each from the Liberal (Democrat) and Conservative (Republican) sides. They should be able to keep the discussion civil and on point. Without such controls, the board can become a shouting match and be no fun for anyone.
Just my 2 cents.
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Originally Posted by poptart View Post
2/14/04

I apologize to any I have offended by my postings in here. I recognized that my left to right style of typing is not "friendly" to the dyslexics among us.
Sincerely,
~ tratpop ~
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Originally Posted by BurghGuy View Post
9/30/05

I'd like to wish everybody a Happy Cement Tree Day!

One of the world's most beloved holiday, Cement Tree Day became an unofficial offical "international" holiday back in 2004. While the cement tree has been around for about 5 years, only now is it being acknowledged as a unofficial official holiday.

Mary Cement married Joe Tree back in 1941 and had 41 children, one of whom would be called Donald Kenneth Cement-Tree - or by how most of you know him, D.K. Cement-Tree. When he was only 8 years old, he began to experiment with cement and poisonous chemicals. And on his 53rd birthday (1994), D.K. Cement-Tree created the world's first cement tree. It was truly a work of art and has become a figure of peace, love and tranquility throughout the world.

D.K. Cement-Tree would only live to see his cement tree for another 2 years before he was killed a tragic, but freak, cement truck accident. And 8 years later, Cement Tree Day became an unofficial official holiday!

So the next time you see one of those cement trees, why not take a minute or two and reflect upon what it really means to you. How did D.K. Cement-Tree impact you into how you live your life today?

Have a great day, people!
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Old 05-21-2008, 10:52 PM   #2
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Finally, a quasi-useful thread in The Lounge. I'll try to dig up some classics this weekend...
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Old 05-22-2008, 10:09 AM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NickHammy View Post
3/27/01

I watched a special on FOX the other night that showed many reasons that we have never gone to the moon.
-First of all, since there is no "air" on the moon, then why is the american flag waving around as if there is wind?
-Secondly, if Neil Armstrong was the first person to set foot on the moon, then how did they get those camera views?
-In many of the pictures they showed, there were shadows going in different directions, which means there was another light source.
-They doubled the speed of them walking on the moon and it looked like they were walking on Earth.
-There is tons of radiation around the Earth that would have made them extremely sick.
-Also there are objects in front of the crooshairs from the camera which could only be done if the picture was edited.
There were many other things they talked about but these are some of the main things.
So...do you think we've been to the moon?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Heathen View Post
5/16/03

So here's a little story of my day.

This morning I went to work as normal. Later I bent down to pick up a printer and caught one of the belt loops on my pants... no big deal right? Wrong.

Later I went to the bathroom and .... well... as I undid my belt to... you know... do the business... my belt swung into the toilet bowl. My cell phone slid off... and into the bowl!!!!

Now it was clean water (well as clean as it gets!!) but my phone was screwed.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kornbix View Post
9/01/03

OK, so one day this thing starts going around the school where everybody knows how to make somebody have a seizure and pass out for a few seconds. I saw like a lot of people doing it and it looked pretty funny.

So today my freinds wanted me to try it. So I did and holy crap was this one of the weirdest things ever. I passed out and it felt like i dont know undescribable but it was cool. It felt like it lasted about 2 hours but my freinds said it last 20 seconds. They were all laughing because i was twicthing and **** during the whole time. But it was cool as hell though. I had no clue where I was when I woke up from it.

It's easy to do: Bend down and take 10 deep breaths, and for it to work they must be good deep breaths. Then stand up, cross your arms across your chest and have a freind squeeze your hard for about 5 seconds and you'll just go out. It felt weird fading out.

WARNING: If you got some condition I wouldn't do this. Because I heard of some dude dieng from doing it to much.
Quote:
Originally posted by ESPO704
2/12/05

My (censored) parody

In the book of Genesis, God gives man dominion over the planet and all the creatures thereupon.

In the book of Matthew (the Parable of the Talents) Jesus illustrates that God will call us to answer for abusing the resources we've been given.

Therefore almost everyone who drives an SUV is sinning against God and is going to hell. The same for anyone who drives a Hummer and isn't currently wearing a military uniform.

Exceptions will be made for those who actually need a heavy-duty off-road vehicle for heavy-duty off-road work. But most people who drive SUVs and Hummers are merely driving them from their gated suburban paradises to the parking garages in their downtown office buildings.

Those people are going to hell.

This isn't an original thought. A few years ago, a left-wing Christian group launched the "What Would Jesus Drive" campaign.
Someone at my church, who totally missed the point, said that because Jesus was a carpenter who traveled with about a dozen of his closest friends, he probably would have driven a pickup truck, with a rack for his ladder and tools.

Maybe that's how it was -- and Judas just got ticked off after one too many times falling out the tailgate.

Anyway, the point of the "Jesus Drive" campaign is that environmentalism is a Christian value -- and those of you who are driving gas guzzlers without good reason will have God to answer to.
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Old 05-22-2008, 04:22 PM   #4
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That Kornbix quote was a great find. I had forgotten about that post. Certainly a classic.
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Old 05-24-2008, 03:50 AM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lmanchur. View Post
3/03/01
Describe yourself -- one condition, though: only use ONE word.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marc View Post
Studmuffin
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wedge231 View Post
9/08/01

Ok, I haven't been participating in any threads for awhile other than the survivor thing. Can someone fill me in on whats going on here right now. I want to start actively posted again.
Quote:
Originally Posted by bama4256 View Post
4/24/02

After graduating from High School in 1974 I got a job at a local funeral home. I just wanted to cut their gr**** but the funeral director talked me into working in the home. He would train me as an apprenticed mortician. I was only 18. Work around dead bodies. Yuck! But I thought it would be exciting and new so i agreed. I made $75.00 a week and brought home $54.00 but I seemed to always have money. Maybe it was because I worked 75 hours per week and slept at the funeral home most the time. I spent the night because I had to receive calls and pick up the remains of people and so on.

Now for the funny part. We had a call one day to pickup a body at a residence in Bayou la Batre, Alabama(that is where Forrest Gump had his shrimp boat-the town is about 25 miles from Mobile. Anyway we went to pick up the body.

When we arrived at the house we knocked on the door and an elderly man opened the door. We were greeted by two men and a woman. All were sitting in the living room. Well to be polite I went to shake hands with everyone and introduce myself. When I got to the last guy sitting in a chair I said Hello my name Is Keith. How are you? He did not respond. The woman pleasantly said he is dead. I about dropped dead myself.

I wondered why he wouldn't shake my hand. They all laughed believe it or not. He was an elderly man and had walked around the block for exercise and came home and sat in the chair and croaked. What an experience. We finally removed him from the chair and took him back to the Funeral home to embalm. My boss rode my ass about that incident for weeks
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Old 05-24-2008, 08:01 AM   #6
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OMG Tark - these are great!!! :thumbsup2:
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Old 05-24-2008, 08:45 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ellis View Post
That Kornbix quote was a great find. I had forgotten about that post. Certainly a classic.
I know huh? I laughed my ass off when I read that one. I can remember doing that to each other when I was in 7th grade way back in 89-90. Glad to see kids are just as dumb today!! :thumbsup2:

Oh, and Bama's "dead guy" story is a classic!
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Old 05-25-2008, 12:55 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by buckeyefan78 View Post
5/06/06

As many of you may recall, I went to Yankee Stadium for the first time last summer. This summer, I'm tackling Wrigley. As you also may recall, I've noted a few times that where I live is nearly the exact halfway point between New York and Chicago (travelling I-80). Well, I'm hammering out my Wrigley trip as I write this and went to yahoo for driving directions to Chicago. Something seemed odd as I looked at the mileage and time it would take for me to get there.

I found out that when I type in my address to Wrigley I come up with 6 hours 3 minutes of travel with 411.2 miles. When I type in my address to Yankee Stadium, I come up with 6 hours 3 minutes of travel with 411.9 miles. Do you know what this means? I LIVE AT THE NEXUS OF THE UNIVERSE! I am the EXACT halfway point between Wrigley and Yankee Stadium.

Now obviously I don't want to give out my address on here, but I've taken the liberty of using a local Taco Bell (:lol: ) and putting it up against Wrigley and Yankee Stadium for comparison in the links below so you can see how close it is for yourself (though that one is more "off" than mine, but I'm not looking up other businesses for this ).

This is AWESOME. First thing tomorrow, I'm putting up one of those signs in my yard with the arrows having one read "Wrigley Field 411 miles" pointing west and another one reading "Yankee Stadium 411 miles" pointing east. Not sure what the wife will say about it, but this is too historic to pass up .
Quote:
Originally Posted by G-MenNMetsfan
3/25/05

mmm....Coco Puffs.

ACtually, Coco PUffs make me get diarrhea. I;m sure that's way too much information.
Quote:
Originally Posted by boston_aloha
10/04/06

I wanna create something... like I have this erge.. I wanna paint, I wanna sculpt.. I just wanna urghhhh.

I gotta hit the can.
Quote:
Originally Posted by da12ken
10/06/06

A typical week for Steve:
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Old 05-25-2008, 11:56 AM   #9
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This stuff is great, thanks! :cheers:

I'm just curious how you remember/find these old posts...
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Old 05-25-2008, 03:38 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Marc View Post

I'm just curious how you remember/find these old posts...
Random clicks basically. This place is a goldmine of 'nuggets'.

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Originally Posted by da12ken View Post
5/25/08

Someone sticky the 20,000 replies thread and keep it from fading into Bolivian.

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Old 05-26-2008, 12:37 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally posted by boston_aloha
https://www.sports-central.org/commu...ostcount=11926

lol... thats gross. I had a roomate once (many years ago) & I came home at 6am after working a 12h night shift, I walk in and see his clothes in the counter neatly folded... then I see a porno on TV, I walk over and see him butt ass naked and passed out on the new leather couch I had just bought. I threw his clothes in his face and said "go to you ****ing room for that ****!"
He didn't wake up or move an inch.
One of my favorites.
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Old 05-26-2008, 02:14 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tigereyes33 View Post
11/24/05

I'm just sick of all this scientific crap in college football. It's just stupid. Everybody just overthinks things these days.
Quote:
Originally Posted by doublee View Post
9/25/04
Guy on the horsey

Is anyone else getting a random background on the site of a tiled image of what appears to be some sort of warrior sitting atop a fire-breathing horse?

https://www.sports-central.org/commu...5&d=1096129366

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Originally Posted by Tarkus View Post
Hey...that's mine...WTF??????

I'm not gettin' it tho...
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Originally Posted by doublee View Post
Wow, that is weird this is the only site I go to where something bizarre like this is happening. I think Tarkus is just trying to screw with me. :uhoh:
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Originally Posted by Tarkus View Post
:lol: Doublee....

So ya figured I cropped the head of the warrior out so no one would recognize me???
Quote:
11/30/04

Originally Posted by cubfan13
What happend on 10-14-2004 at 02:22 PM when SC had 76(or something) members here?
Quote:
Originally Posted by KevinBeane
That's when we had the $5,000 drawing....I don't remember the details, but Marc got some sort of big rebate for switching servers and he decided to generate some traffic and interest by giving it away to a random user at 2:30 that day. Noon won.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Noon
Yeah, it was awesome.

I sometimes refer to 10-14-2004 as the best day of my life.

I bought a pony and named it Charlie.
Quote:
Originally Posted by gconnhokiebird
how did peole know about this?
Quote:
Originally Posted by KevinBeane
We sent out emails to a lot of people.


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Old 05-26-2008, 02:16 AM   #13
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I miss Noon. He was hilarious. And he had lesbians in bed as his avatar.
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Old 05-30-2008, 05:39 PM   #14
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Saw this in an old thread entitled "do you have 2 mothers" and immediately thought of mush.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Steelhurtin View Post
Are you or do you know one of these married/dating men? When asked to do something by a friend do you have to ask your wifes or girlfriends permission? I must be lucky, because I have NEVER had to ask my wifes permission.
Example. Friend asks me to play golf. I ask wife if we are doing anything Saturday, if not then I go. I never have to say "honey, can I go play golf Saturday?" I have a mom, I don't need 2.

This is a very common thing for married men. How do we help them?

S
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ellis View Post
What makes insanity so bad? Just as too much of anything is bad, being too sane is definitely not a good thing.
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Old 05-30-2008, 05:46 PM   #15
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A great one by Heathen. Wish he would come back.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Heathen View Post
OK.. here is my little story I wanna share with you about how much I love my job.

I work as a subcontractor for four major service companies in Canada. My job involves recieving calls via a pager then going to a site and doing the job.

I fix ATM's, cash registers, Point Of Sale systems, Interac Machines for Shell, ESSO, Petro Canada etc. I also fix the cash systems for most fast fodd places, Burger King, A&W, Wendy's, Dairy Queen etc.

This is my little story. My pager went off at 6pm on Sunday, so JOY... off to work I go. This call was in Brooks at an A&W, they needed a new pin-pad for their debit machine, a two minute job, but with an hour drive either side

So off I went and got to the site at about 7:15 and by 7:20 I was done. I got the customer to sign the work order and I was walking out of the door when my cell phone rang. It was my friend who wanted to know where I was as I was meant to come round and watch the Sunday NFL game at his house. He asked me how it was going and asked where I was. I told him Brooks and he laughed....

... Brooks is home to the biggest slaughter-house in Canada, so the whole town stinks.

I said "Yeah I'm in Brooks" He asked me if it smelled today and I said "Yeah... of course... I'm in Brooks, it always smells in this town". Laughing I picked up my stuff and left.

Today my regional manager called me and said that the A&W in Brooks had complained about me because I said their town smells... which it does. He appologised and called me. After I told him what happened he laughed.

Now my point is this, yes I was at work... well actually I was just finished work was leaving the site, but this was a personal call and they complained about it.

At least my manager saw the funny side. He called the site and told them that it was a personal call and he would not be taking any action against me as I was finished the service call, and in no way said that thier resturant smelled.

People piss me off I mean how petty can you get??

Oh well...
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Quote:
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What makes insanity so bad? Just as too much of anything is bad, being too sane is definitely not a good thing.
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