Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.
1. Jimmie Johnson — After a brief hiatus from the top of the points, Johnson's sixth-place finish, 32 places ahead of previous points leader Biffle, shot him back to the front. Nearly a 100-point turnaround has Johnson 73 ahead of Biffle, and 136 in front of the surging Tony Stewart.
"If I was, in fact, laughing at Biffle's qualifying spin at Sonoma, which I wasn't," explains Johnson, "then I am laughing now. Haha! I hope you enjoyed your 15 minutes of fame, Biffle, because it's over. If not for those Dollar Store transmissions me and the Hendrick boys ran in Sonoma, you never would have been on top at all. So, you're welcome!"
Johnson chased eventual Daytona winner Stewart practically all day, but never could match the No. 20 car's perfection, and faded from second to sixth in the closing laps after falling out of the draft. After qualifying third, Johnson tucked in behind Stewart's rear bumper, and seemed to be the only car that could remotely challenge the No. 20.
In his three starts at Chicagoland, Johnson has finished no lower than fourth, and was runner-up to Stewart last year. Sunday at the USG Sheetrock 400 may be a repeat of Daytona, with Johnson and Stewart dueling for the win. Whatever the outcome, Johnson will still be points leader at the end of the day.
2. Greg Biffle — The biggest fireworks of July 2nd, as far as impact on the points race was concerned, occurred on lap 73 when Biffle was clipped as Michael Waltrip rebounded off the wall after losing his right rear tire and spinning. The No. 16 National Guard car suffered extensive right side damage, and Biffle finished 36th, 31 laps off the lead. Biffle's brief reign as points leader ended as Johnson finished sixth and reclaimed the lead.
"It was good to be king for a day, or a week, as it was," says Biffle. "But what's really strange is the fact that I was taken out by the NAPA Auto Parts No. 15 car. That's not strange in itself, but it became odd when Michael Waltrip tried to sell me some car parts just moments after the crash."
Strange indeed, Greg. That's a case of a car sponsorship paying immediate dividends. That would be like blowing an engine and then having Tony Stewart try to sell you some of his new barbecue sauce, Smoke.
Before the Pepsi 400, Biffle had four results of 25th or worse. On three of those occasions, Biffle responded in the following race with a win. While he may not win the race, the pattern is clear that Biffle responds positively to adversity. In his previous two Nextel Cup races at Chicagoland, Biffle has two 20th-place finishes. Expect him to outdo that by at least 10 places.
3. Tony Stewart — Tony! Tony! Tony?
Stewart's second consecutive win went down in dominating fashion, with Stewart taking the pole and leading a race-record 151 of 160 laps, capturing his first victory at Daytona. Stewart will try to complete the trifecta this Sunday at Chicagoland Speedway, where he is the defending race winner. To celebrate his Pepsi 400 win, Stewart chose to forego the tired, passé victory burnout, and instead climbed the catchfence in a stunning display of originality.
"Pardon me, Helio Castronueves here. I think anyone who calls themselves an auto racing fan knows that the catchfence climb is an Helio original. Stewart knows that, as well, and will be hearing from my lawyers. He has infringed on my patent, violated my copyright, and broken the laws of physics. How did that fence maintain its integrity with such force being exerted on it?"
Stewart will try to become the first driver to win three consecutive races since Jimmie Johnson did it last year. The USG Sheetrock 400 stacks up well for the No. 20 Home Depot Monte Carlo — last year, Stewart led 160 of 267 laps on his way to his first victory of 2004.
4. Rusty Wallace — Wallace certainly enjoyed his Fourth of July weekend, scoring his second consecutive fourth-place finish and advancing to fourth in the Nextel Cup standings, 205 behind Johnson. In addition, younger brother Mike, in the No. 4 Lucas Oil car, joined Rusty in the top 10, finishing eighth after starting dead last.
"Four seemed to be the lucky number for us this weekend," says Rusty. "Two's a crowd, three's a party, and four's a Wallace family reunion. Which, incidentally, is the last time two Wallace's finished in the top 10 — at the Wallace Family Reunion Go Kart Showdown."
Wallace is currently working on a streak of six straight finishes of 11th of better. He's also qualified 20th or better in 13 straight races. Wallace can keep both streaks alive Sunday by duplicating his results at Chicagoland last year, where he finished 11th after qualifying 20th.
5. Elliott Sadler — Despite being the recipient of two "lucky dog" free passes to the lead lap at Daytona, Sadler experienced quite an unlucky day en route to a 21st-place finish. Sadler's misfortune cost him a spot in the points leaderboard — he now stands fourth, 200 behind current leader Johnson.
The bad luck struck first on lap 36, when the No. 38 car was scheduled for its first pit. However, a nine-car accident necessitated a caution, and while waiting for pit road to open, Sadler ran out of gas. After a push to the pits by a wrecker, Sadler re-entered a lap down.
"Not only is that unlucky," says Sadler, "that's embarrassing. That's like picking up your prom date in a limousine pulled by a tow truck, then having your date dump you for the tow truck driver. That happened to me, you know."
Later in the race, Sadler pitted under green and again fell a lap down. He joined the lead lap again on lap 141 as the "lucky dog," but again was affected by a lap 147 accident, which forced him to pit.
Sadler's best finish on the 1.5 mile tri-oval at Chicagoland is a ninth in 2003. Until last week, Sadler had held the number three spot in the points since Charlotte. To regain that position, he needs a top-10, and he needs Tony Stewart's hot streak to end.
6. Jamie McMurray — McMurray overcame a qualifying effort of 33rd to finish second, his second runner-up of the year. As has often been the case this year, McMurray was the lone bright spot for Chip Ganassi Racing, as teammates Sterling Marlin and Casey Mears finished, 22nd and 43rd, respectively.
"I'd like to take this opportunity to declare my independence from Ganassi Racing," says McMurray. "I feel I deserve a ride in a car with a big name sponsor, preferably beer. I feel with my youth and blonde highlights, I can sell more beer than motor oil."
Well, Jamie, it's been reported that you just signed a deal to drive the No. 6 car starting in 2007. Better than beer — Viagra!
McMurray's previous second place came at Texas, on a speedway very similar to that of Chicagoland. He has an eighth and a 13th in his only two Nextel starts there, which is consistent, and consistency is what McMurray has lived by this year. McMurray has 11 top-15s and has only two results worse than 25th.
7. Ryan Newman — Newman quietly posted his 12th top-15 of the year, finishing 14th after qualifying a disappointing 27th. The No. 12 Alltel Dodge was headed for a sure top-10 finish until a pit road collision on lap 141 forced four extra pit stops for repairs. Amazingly, Newman passed 12 cars in the final nine laps to finalize a well-earned outcome.
"Heck, maybe we should wreck in pit lane more often," says Newman. "My car ran better there at the end than it did earlier. Not only is duct tape very adhesive, it's also aerodynamic, and it makes a great lint remover."
Toss out a 34th at Chicagoland last year, and Newman has been strong on the 1.5-mile tri-oval. He won the race in 2003, and started on the pole in 2002 on his way to a fifth-place finish. Newman has six poles in 18 races (including the Nextel Open), which is a pole every three races. His last pole was, what do you know, three races ago in Michigan. Newman will start from the pole, and should do battle with Stewart and Johnson for the win.
8. Mark Martin — Martin was an innocent bystander on a lap 36 crash that started when Scott Riggs rear-ended the pitting car of Jamie McMurray. The result was an amalgamation of skid marks, damaged race cars, and dashed hopes for a decent finish in the Pepsi 400. Martin was only able to complete 88 laps, and finished 39th. Teammate Kurt Busch also fell victim in the accident, and finished 37th, and fellow Roush drivers Greg Biffle and Carl Edwards finished 36th and 33rd, respectively, due to later accidents.
"What a way to go out," laments Martin. "Zero for 40 at Daytona for my career. I think I could have fared better swinging a pool cue trying to hit a Nolan Ryan 100-mph fastball. Good riddance, Daytona."
It was a costly accident for Martin, resulting in a three-spot drop in the points standings. However, Martin fortified his standing as one of the most resilient drivers in history by returning from a mandatory visit to the infield care center to continue racing in his damaged car.
Martin has a best of sixth in four career Chicagoland starts, and will need a similar finish to recapture lost momentum (three of four previous starts before Daytona resulted in top tens). Chicagoland bodes well for the Roush contingent, as Martin and teammates have been consistently strong on intermediate-length tracks.
9. Dale Jarrett — Jarrett joined fellow old-schooler and 40-something Rusty Wallace in the top five at Daytona, finishing fifth and leading one of the nine laps that Tony Stewart didn't. Jarrett is now tied with Kurt Busch for ninth in the points, 348 behind Johnson, as the No. 88 UPS Ford heads to Chicagoland looking for a third consecutive top five.
"As the driver of the UPS car," says Jarrett, "I've noticed a problem in deliveries to Chicagoland Speedway. It's not even in Chicago! The same goes for Charlotte Motor Speedway — not in Charlotte! Atlanta Motor Speedway — not in Atlanta! Are these tracks trying to hide from people?!"
Good point, Dale. On that same note, what about wrestlers who hail from "Parts Unknown?" I bet they never get their mail.
D.J. has a good chance to swing his third straight top-five. In four starts at the track in Joliet, Illinois, Jarrett has two top-fives and an 11th.
10. Jeff Gordon — Gordon vaulted back into Chase contention with a seventh at Daytona, breaking a streak of two straight finishes in the 30s and scoring his first top-10 since Pocono. After advancing one place in the points, Gordon now stands 396 behind Johnson, just inside the 400-point Chase-qualifying window.
"Slump over, baby!" exclaims Gordon.
Not so fast, J. Go. Sure, you finished seventh, but you never challenged for the win at all. Previously, you had won the last three restrictor plate races, including two at Daytona. With those qualifications on your resume, doesn't a seventh at the Pepsi 400 seem a little disappointing?
"Well, I guess you're right," laments Gordon. "I've heard of motivational speakers before, but never a de-motivational speaker. You could make Forrest Gump a pessimist."
Hey, the truth hurts. But don't worry. Your history at Chicagoland bodes well for a second consecutive top 10, which is a good thing, as long as you say goodbye to the DNFs and finishes in the 30s. In four starts there, you've got two fourths and a second, plus a pole and another front-row start. So cheer up, Jeff.
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