Foul Territory: Champs and Chumps

* He Drains the Main Vein in White Plains, or Peter Out, or Uri-Nate, or I May Be Only 5'9," But Don't Call Me "Wee" — Oklahoma City Thunder guard Nate Robinson was cited after police caught him urinating on a sidewalk outside a bookstore in White Plains, New York early last Friday. Robinson will likely pay a $50 fine, and probably won't be disciplined by the team. Robinson apologized, and Thunder head coach Scott Brooks accepted, and fittingly told Robinson to "shake it off."

* That Bites — The Boston Bruins won Game 7 4-0 over the Vancouver Canucks, taking a hotly contested Stanley Cup championship. Interestingly, Vancouver's Daniel Sedin, who on Tuesday said the Canucks were going to win Game 7, was left biting his tongue, and not anyone's finger.

* "NY" Stands For "Not Yet" — Derek Jeter strained his right calf running out a fly ball on Monday, and was placed on the disabled list, which puts his pursuit of the 3,000-hit mantle on hold. Jeter led off the bottom of the first in Monday's game against the Indians with a single, giving him 2,994 hits for his career. Manager Joe Girardi, eyes planted firmly on Jorge Posada, said he was grateful for having an easy decision to bench a player.

* No. 1 Directive Agency, or Drew to a Shill — Former Ohio State quarterback Terrelle Pryor hired Drew Rosenhaus as his agent, and Pryor declared for the NFL's supplemental draft. Rosenhaus' first order of business was talking up Pryor, and he said that Pryor will be a "great" NFL quarterback. Rosenhaus' second order of business was informing Pryor that he only accepts cash.

* Germanator, or Unanimous "Decision" — The Dallas Mavericks closed out the Miami Heat, winning Game 6 105-95 on Sunday and claiming the NBA title 4 games to 2. Dirk Nowitzki was named most valuable player, and laid claim to the title of NBA's best player, just days after Dwyane Wade and LeBron James mocked the illness that slowed Nowitzki for the latter part of the series. If James had any case to consider himself the NBA's best, he "coughed it up" during the Finals.

* Cut Me, a Ribbon, Lou!, or Thankfully, No Children Were Eaten During the Induction Ceremony — Mike Tyson and Sylvester Stallone were inducted into the International Boxing Hall of Fame on Sunday in Canastota, New York. An emotional Tyson choked up and fumbled his words before ending his induction speech early in front of a rapt audience, who, surprisingly, were "all ears."

* PED-al to the Meddle, or Tour De France-y Meeting You Here — Lance Armstrong and Tyler Hamilton crossed paths in an Aspen, Colorado restaurant over the weekend. Hamilton claimed the confrontation was combative, while Armstrong contended it was "uneventful." Apparently, according to Hamilton, Armstrong made several pointed threats. Hamilton replied with a retort that has become all too familiar for Armstrong: "What's gotten into you?"

* Group of Near-Death, or Two Out of Three Ain't Bad — The United States beat Guadeloupe 1-0 on Tuesday to slip in to the quarterfinals of the Gold Cup, overcoming a stunning loss to Panama on Saturday. They will face Jamaica on Sunday in Washington, D.C. The inconsistent and underperforming U.S squad seems headed for a disappointing Gold Cup result, which would confirm the growing notion that American is a "soccer-mad" country.

* Kenny and the Debts, or Lie-censed to Ill — Tennessee Titans wide receiver Kenny Britt has two arrest warrants outstanding in Tennessee, alleging that he provided inaccurate information on two separate license applications. Attorney Jonathan Farmer said Britt would be in Tennessee soon to handle the warrants, and instructed the simple-minded Britt that he is, by state law, obligated to return because Tennessee is the "Volunteer" state.

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