* New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft appears on "Wheel of Fortune." In round two, he faces the following puzzle: "__ OP, SKIP, AND A __ UMP." Which two letters should he request to correctly solve the puzzle and place his order at the Orchids of Asia Day Spa?
A. "C" and "D"
B. "W" and "P"
C. "H" and "J"
D. None of the above. Kraft doesn't request, he solicits.
* Tiger Woods badly slices his tee shot on the Par 5 14th hole at St. Andrews. His errant drive is most likely to hit:
A. At least one woman he's slept with
B. The rough
C. The North Sea
D. A fire hydrant
* Charles Barkley is driving at a rate of 95 miles per hour to meet a "friend" for "drinks." What is the model of the car he is driving?
A. Mercedes-Benz
B. Honda
C. BMW
D. Hummer
* Mike Trout's best "wins above replacement" in a season is 10.5. WAR does not take into account:
A. At-bats
B. Home runs
C. Times caught stealing
D. Personality
* A rash of jock itch strikes all the members of the 2017 Houston Astros. This is an example of a locker room being _________:
A. Extremely "tainted"
B. Scratched
C. Quarantined
D. Big Baller Branded
* MMA star Jon Jones signs a lucrative endorsement deal with a major soft drink maker, a deal that includes a personal lifetime supply of the product. Which phrase is most indicative of what Jones can expect to receive in addition to money?
A. Gallons of Mountain Dew
B. Liters of Pepsi
C. Grams of Coke
D. Buckets of Sprite
* In an Olympics gymnastics competition, what are you most likely to see on a pommel horse?
A. A male
B. A female
C. Scissoring
D. Marsellus Wallace
* Lance Armstrong walks into a drug testing facility waiting room wearing jeans, sneakers, and a Hawaiian shirt. A hipster there is most likely to describe Armstrong's shirt as:
A. "Deck"
B. "Rad"
C. "Midtown"
D. "Dope"
* Peyton Manning completes a pass to Marvin Harrison, who is covered tightly by two defenders. What is something with an area of 4 square feet that can be used to describe this situation?
A. Harrison's catch radius
B. Reception window
C. Manning's forehead
D. Jim Irsay's prescription pad
E. All of the above
* Shaquille O'Neal stands at the free throw line for one shot. Shaq has a 52.7% chance of:
A. Making
B. Missing
C. Applying Gold Bond ointment to The General on a Carnival Cruise
D. Agreeing to star in "Kazaam 2"
* A person donates $2 million to the University of Miami athletic department. This person is most likely a:
A. Booster
B. Cartel representative
C. Felon
D. Type "U" personality
* It is Christmas 1975. You receive a package in the mail containing a VHS copy of a classic Muhammad Ali/Joe Frazier heavyweight title fight from earlier that same year. What phrase best describes the gift?
A. Dick in a Box
B. Thrilla in Manilla Envelope
C. Mail fraud
D. Rumble in the Amazon Jungle Package
* What was lit on July 19, 1996, and by whom?
A. Hair, Michael Jackson
B. Face, Richard Pryor
C. Olympic torch, Muhammad Ali
D. Cheech, Chong
* Complete the following sentence uttered by legendary announcer Jack Buck at the conclusion of Game 1 of the 1988 World Series: "I don't believe what I just ________!"
A. Had injected into my ass
B. Saw
C. Pooped
D. Said to Congress
* Fill in the blank with the appropriate verb: In the 1978 Gator Bowl, Ohio State head coach Woody Hayes ________ a Clemson player.
A. Outed
B. Punched
C. Culturally appropriated
D. RKO'd
* Rank the following from highest to lowest: Michael Jordan NBA championships; children fathered by Antonio Cromartie; Antonio Cromartie baby mommas; Nolan Ryan no-hitters; games Sammy Sosa was suspended for using a corked bat; Michael Phelps' career Olympic gold medals; Ryan Lochte IQ.
* Choose the correct combination of words to accurately complete the following sentence: Wilt Chamberlain once scored 100 ______ in a ______.
A. Times, week
B. Out of 100, paternity test
C. Points, game
D. All of the above
* In a post-fight interview after knocking out Lou Savarese in 38 seconds on June 24th, 2000, what did Mike Tyson threaten to do to Lennox Lewis?
A. Force him into a threesome with Robin Givens and Don King
B. Eat his children
C. Saute his children
D. Deflower him
* The "Disco Demolition Night" promotion at Comiskey Park on July 12th, 1979 ended in a _______.
A. Split decision
B. Riot
C. Broadway song and dance number
D. White Sox scandal
* After scoring the fifth kick in the penalty shootout to give the United States the win over China in the final of the 1999 Women's World Cup, Brandi Chastain celebrated by removing her _______.
A. Dentures
B. Soul
C. Wig
D. Jersey
* Barry Bonds smashes a 530 foot home run into McCovey Cove on July 4th, 2007. After crossing the place, Bonds tips his cap to the fans. His cap is most likely:
A. Larger than it was in 1993
B. Smaller than it was in 1993
C. Under investigation
D. Juiced
* Former Chicago White Sox slugger Frank Thomas was known as the "Big _______."
A. Dick Energy
B. Testosterone
C. Hurt
D. Lebowski
* Who sang the "Star Spangled Banner" at Super Bowl XXV in Tampa on January 27, 1991, just 10 days after the start of the Persian Gulf War?
A. Hoobastank
B. Sugar Ray
C. Whitney Houston
D. Up With People
* Match the imaginary musical duo with their potential hit song.
A. Pete Rose / Wesley Snipes 1. "Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap"
B. Roger Clemens / Milli Vanilli 2. "Enter Sandman"
C. AC/DC / Tonya Harding 3. "Always Bet on Baseball"
D. Mike Francesa / Metallica 4. "Girl You Know It's Untrue"
Leave a Comment