Saturday, I submit, is even more for vegging in front of the TV than NFL Sunday is. The work week is over; you need to recharge.
The problem is, we are still in the lean months; no NFL, NBA, or NHL. So what do we watch this Saturday? Don't worry, Slant Pattern's here to help! All times Eastern:
FOX — LIV Golf at 11 AM, Horse Racing at 2 PM, Major League Baseball at 7 PM.
I've done plenty of bashing of LIV Golf in this space, and perhaps FOX doesn't think much of it either, if it's giving more air time to non-Triple Crown, non-Breeders Cup horse racing. The baseball will be Cubs vs. Cardinals in most of the country, but Phillies vs. Texas in all of the Northeast and Northwest U.S., and Texas.
NBC — World Aquatics Championships at 1 PM, PGA Golf at 3 PM.
NBC has fewer sports contracts than the other big networks (although they recently picked up NBA rights), so they lean heavily into Olympics sports and, as America's long-time Olympics rights-holders, trumpet the fact all quadrennium long. These Aquatics Championships are in Singapore, so no, they're not live.
ABC — PLL Lacrosse at 11.
Ay ay ay! A major over-the air-network showing lacrosse really lets you know they feel an obligation to put some sport on Saturday afternoon, but don't have the rights to anything popular. The rest of the afternoon is non-sports programming, which will probably garner even lower ratings than the lacrosse.
CBS — World's Strongest Man at 3, Big3 basketball at 4, WNBA at 8.
I sometimes write about how I'm a big proponent of spring football, but I'm bad about actually watching it; I feel the same way about BIG3 basketball; I'm a big proponent of it, theoretically, but I very rarely watch it. Maybe this weekend I will stem that tide.
ESPN — Little League Baseball and Softball, all day and into the night.
Did you guys see how the Oklahoma LL baseball team was stealing signs? Hopefully they will be eliminated by this point.
ESPN2 — Little League Softball at 5, Popdarts Championship at 7, Pop-A-Shot Championship at 8, Banana Ball at 9.
I champion obscure sports and even I don't know what popdarts are. Pop-A-Shot, I assume, is that carnival basketball game where you sink as many shots as you can in a short amount of time. Banana ball gets a lot of hate from baseball purists, but it's simply the baseball version of the Harlem Globetrotters.
FS1 — MLS Soccer at 8:30, PPA Tour pickleball at 11.
During the day, it's a bunch of horse and auto racing. For years now, pickleball has been the super-duper growing sport of our country, and yet for some reason I can't find a sportsbook taking odds on it.
FS2 — LIV Golf at 1 PM.
Again, LIV Golf can't get no respect, getting kicked all the way to FS2 after FOX's coverage concludes, bypassing the far-more-available FS1. Good. Like FS1, it's a bunch of horse and auto racing the rest of the day.
CBS Sports Network — Soccer Friendly 9 AM, CFL Football at 3 PM and 7 PM
As a huge CFL fan, I'm biased, but in my opinion CBSSN has put together a more compelling day of sports than almost every other network that has way more reach. The friendly is a decently high-level one (Atletico Madrid at Newcastle), and the CFL games are Ottawa at Toronto and Winnipeg at Calgary.
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