Former Arizona Cardinals head coach and current Redskins coordinator Joe Bugle once coined the phrase, "if you're not cheating, you're not trying." If that's the case, you have to give the bulk of Major League Baseball players an "A" for effort.
Rumors and questions have swirled around the game for many years now regarding the issue of steroids. Now comes critically-acclaimed author and human being Jose Canseco, who has decided to spill the beans on baseball's worst-kept secret.
The names [Mark] McGwire, [Barry] Bonds, [Jason] Giambi, [Juan] Gonzales, and Pudge [Rodriguez] have all popped up in newspapers and websites. The three- and four-letter sports networks have spent all week analyzing whether or not we should trust Jose's words at face value.
My analysis: who cares? Hellen Keller could see that steroids have been and still are running rampant throughout Baseball. Maybe not as rampant as they once did, but they are still as big apart of the game as empty sunflower seed shells and overpriced, lukewarm beer.
For those "world-class athletes" who decide that using the juice is the best way to go, they are big boys, let them have at it. They must know the risks involved when injecting these toxins into their body. The use of steroids can cause acne, water retention, hypertension, aggression, cardiovascular disease, heart palpitations, impotence, and jaundice.
They have to know that these side effects could be induced by trying to gain an unfair advantage, don't they? If they don't, this and more information can be found in less than 15 seconds by using your favorite search engine.
If these ballplayers are comfortable with destroying their liver and seriously altering their sex life, so am I! I don't overpay for stadium seats to see ground balls and pop-ups. I want to see these monsters crank one out at any cost they are willing to pay.
Does this mean that these skilled talents belong in the Hall of Fame? Absolutely not. A new Hall should be dedicated to the likes of Jose Canseco, Ken Caminiti, Ben Johnson, Lyle Alzado, and Hulk Hogan.
No matter how much Major League Baseball alters its drug testing policy, the fact remains that if you or I are shooting up, we can pencil in some vacation time in a state-owned hotel complete with sleeping quarters, jumpsuits, and three squares of gruel a day. If these guys get caught, they will receive 10 games to vacation in Cancun.
There is an old adage that states cheaters never prosper. That statement still rings true for those sluggers cashing million dollar checks, and swimming in adulation from adoring fans, young and old alike.
Lets just see how this season shakes out for Jason Giambi, playing in the media fishbowl that is New York City. Giambi will try to recapture a greatness he only possessed while cheating. Let's just see how this season works out for Sammy Sosa, whose numbers have steadily declined over the past four seasons. And Sammy Sosa moves into a new ballpark and a new league with as much to prove as anyone in the game.
Let's just see how this season rolls along for Barry Bonds. Bonds is on the cusp of passing Babe Ruth, en route to being the all-time home run king.
The baseball fans across America didn't inject the needle into the players' hindquarters, but we might as well have loaded the syringe. We are a society obsessed with the slam-dunk, the bone-crushing tackle, and the long ball. We pay their salaries to see them accomplish feats that we could never quite dream of. Everyone wants to eat the chicken, but we don’t want hear about how it is cooked. The use of steroids in baseball is the chicken. For the record books, it's far too late to send it back to the chef.
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