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Old 03-14-2007, 02:29 PM   #1
CKFresh
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Default Bushisms

Just thought we should dedicate a thread to the words of our articulate and charismatic leader.

For starters...

"Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream."

"I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family."

"I hear there's rumors on the Internets that we're going to have a draft."

"I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully."

"There's an old saying in Tennessee I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee that says, fool me once, shame on shame on you. Fool me you can't get fooled again."

and finally,

"Rarely is the questioned asked: Is our children learning?"

All quotes from our great leader, George W. Bush!
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Old 03-14-2007, 02:51 PM   #2
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The center for Disease Control in Atlanta, Georgia, announced today that President Clinton has proven that you CAN get sex from Aides!

Jennifer Flowers was asked if her relationship with Bill Clinton was anything like the Monica Lewinski affair. She supposedly replied, "Close, but no cigar."

Bill Gates is in New York showing all the computer executives how well Windows 98 works. But the computer executives say that Windows 98 goes down so much they are thinking about renaming it Monica 98.

Did you know that Bill Clinton is considering changing the Democratic seal from a donkey to a condom, because it represents inflation, halts production, and gives you a false sense of security while you are being screwed.

After much arguing and deliberation, historians this week have come up with a phrase to describe the Clinton Era. It will be called: SEX BETWEEN THE BUSHES.

The FBI has coined a technical term for the stains found on Monica's dress "Presidue."

Clinton now recruits interns from only four colleges: Moorhead, Oral Roberts, Ball State and Bringham Young.

Washington has come up with a solution for the Clinton situation - they added an 11th commandment: "Thou shalt not put thy rod in thy staff."

Arkansas is very proud of Bill Clinton. All these women coming forward and not one is his sister!

Chrysler Corporation is adding a new car to its line to honor Bill
Clinton.The Dodge Draft will begin production in Canada this year.

When Clinton was asked what he thought about foreign affairs, he replied,
"I don't know. I never had one."


If you came across Bill Clinton struggling in a raging river and you had
a choice between rescuing him or getting a Pulitzer prize-winning
photograph, what shutter speed would you use?


Chelsea asked her dad, "Do all fairy tales begin with once upon a
time...?" Bill Clinton replied, "No. Some begin with 'After I'm
elected...'"

Clinton's mother prayed fervently that Bill would grow up and be president.
So far, half of her prayer has been answered.

The American Indians have nicknamed Bill Clinton as "Walking Eagle"
because he is so full of poop that he can't fly.

Isn't putting Bill Clinton in charge of a trust fund as insane as putting
in a draft-dodger as Commander in Chief?

Clinton only lacks three things to become one of America's finest
leaders: Integrity, vision, and wisdom.

Asked about his views on euthanasia, Clinton replied, "Youth in Asia are
just like kids everywhere else."

Clinton is doing the work of 3 men: Larry, Curly, and Moe.

Revised judicial oath: "I solemnly swear to tell the truth as I Know it,
the whole truth, as I believe it to be, and nothing but what I think you
need to know."
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Old 03-14-2007, 03:04 PM   #3
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Hmmm....

Once again, we back to Clinton...

Monica, is that you? Stop obsessing over Clinton you freak.
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Old 03-14-2007, 03:21 PM   #4
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Learn to talk like Bush...

http://www.figarospeech.com/talk-like-bush/
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Old 03-14-2007, 03:30 PM   #5
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I did not have sex with that woman!

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Now we know Bill was talking about Hillary!
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Old 03-14-2007, 03:57 PM   #6
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Quote:
I did not have sex with that woman!
He may not be the most honest man, but at least he has the ability to speak in complete sentences, using proper English grammar. I'll take a Rhodes Scholar liar any day over a C-average student, especially when it comes to RUNNING THE MOST POWERFUL NATION IN HISTORY.
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Old 03-14-2007, 04:02 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CKFresh View Post
I'll take a Rhodes Scholar liar any day....
About two years into Bubba Clinton's reign, somebody mentioned to me that Bill was a Rhodes Scholar..... I pissed my pants laughing for nearly a solid week after that... very embarrassing!

Says something about the decline of the Rhodes Trust in Oxford!
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Old 03-14-2007, 04:18 PM   #8
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Quote:
Says something about the decline of the Rhodes Trust in Oxford!
Ok... I guess you've never heard what Clinton's IQ is. For your information, his IQ is higher than 160. I wonder what Dubya's is...lol.

Intellectual distinction is a necessary but not a sufficient condition for election to a Rhodes Scholarship. Selection committees are charged to seek excellence in qualities of mind and in qualities of person which, in combination, offer the promise of effective service to the world in the decades ahead. The Rhodes Scholarships, in short, are investments in individuals rather than in project proposals. Accordingly, applications are sought from talented students without restriction as to their field of academic specialization or career plans although the proposed course of study must be available at Oxford, and the applicant's undergraduate program must provide a sufficient basis for further study in the proposed field. Through the years, Rhodes Scholars have pursued studies in all of the varied fields available at the University of Oxford.
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Old 03-14-2007, 06:48 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CKFresh View Post
For your information, his IQ is higher than 160...
He got caught porking an intern in the Oval Office and lied about it and was impeached; even a severely mentally retarded person wouldn't have done something so stupid! If his IQ is 160 than Bozo the Clown's 1,000!

:lol:
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